| Kabbalah
and Education A Kabbalistic Approach to Spiritual Growth |
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| Kabbalah and Jewish Meditation |
Part
40 Effective
communication is the primary skill of an educator. It is the critical
ingredient which determines whether a particular encounter will have a
positive or negative impact on the student. He who aspires to become a more
effective teacher must learn to observe himself as he speaks, monitoring his
communication both for style and content in order to aim for the hearts of
his students. Since different individuals respond differently to the same
idea or tone of voice, an educator must customize his approach to the needs
of each person. Effective communication is a science, requiring both
meticulous attention to the nonverbal signals of the listener as well as the
versatility to adjust one's delivery accordingly. In
a teacher-student relationship, poor communication always signals a lack of
concern on the part of the educator. To the extent that the teacher is
preoccupied with his role of putting out information, of dazzling his
students with his superior knowledge, of hearing himself talk, to that
extent his teaching becomes an egotistical indulgence rather than an act of
giving. Only
if his purpose in teaching is to awaken the heart of his students to truth,
does his communication become an expression of love and concern. When the
educator's intention is to give, he will find exactly where his students are
holding, what they need, and speak directly to that place. This is the
quality which distinguishes a true and successful teacher. On
a much more subtle level, this was the error which initiated the sequence of
events that culminated in Adam and Eve's eating from the Tree of Knowledge
of Good and Evil. God gave the commandment not to eat from the Tree of
Knowledge to Adam in his initial state of androgynous unification of male
and female, that is, before Eve was brought into being. Therefore, when she
emerged as an independent entity, Adam had to explicitly relay the message
to her, in order that it should become part of her conscious awareness. We
learn, from Eve's conversation with the serpent, that Adam added to the
original commandment, informing her that God had forbidden them from eating and
touching the tree, both under penalty of certain death. He made no
distinction between God's commandment (the prohibition of eating) and his
own modification (the prohibition of touching). He was so enamored by his
own innovation that he became careless in his communication. This minute
trace of egotism carried profound consequences. The serpent seized upon this
subtle misrepresentation of the truth, pushed Eve into the tree, and
convinced her that just as she did not die from touching it, so she would
not die from eating its fruit. The
rest is history. The
story of Adam and Eve teaches a basic principle of communication. A teacher
must be motivated solely by concern for his students, desiring to give them
exactly what they need in order that they may grow both personally and
spiritually. Any ulterior motive on the part of the educator will certainly
reduce the effectiveness of his teaching, and may even cause damage. Whereas
Adam's mistake was very subtle, ours, unfortunately, are more blatant. For
example, if we talk "at" another person, meaning that we are
primarily concerned with hearing ourselves speak, and if we weave Torah in
and out of our egotistical monologues, then when the listener turns off to
us, he or she turns off to Torah as well. Similarly, if the educator relays
only his own words, then the
student may reject only him. However, if he speaks words of Torah and wields
them like a club, then the student may reject Torah as well. (This
mirrors the flaw in Adam's communication to Eve. Because of a slight trace
of ego, Adam failed to differentiate between what were God's words and what
were his. This miscommunication became the breach through which the evil
inclination, embodied in the serpent, entered.) The
sages tell us that when an educator speaks honestly and sincerely, for the
sake of giving, his words penetrate into the heart of his listener. Hassidic
teachings develop this idea further, noting that
although words of simple truth will enter and create a heartfelt
response in the listeners, still such words will not become engraved in the
listeners' memory or have enduring impact, unless they are also deliberate
and articulate. That is, unless they are perfectly sculpted to the need of
that moment, to the listeners' level, their questions, their sense of
aesthetic, and their preference for either the rational, mystical or
emotional side of Torah. If the educator fulfills these criteria of
sincerity and deliberation, then his words will stay with his student, even
after they have parted ways. Otherwise his words will soon be forgotten.
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